Send in your questions frankly; the editor of this section is ready to answer them with the same frankness.
Q — May a woman openly confess to a man her love for him?
A — A man sacrifices much for the sake of the woman he loves; but once he is assured of her love, he settles down and no longer has need of sacrifice.
Q — I am married to a man I do not love, and therefore I feel wretched in my married life. What is to be done?
A — It is a problem of very frequent occurrence, especially in our society, which still looks upon marriage as though it were the parents' right to decide it, without recourse to the opinion of the young man or the girl. Our advice to you, madam, is to have recourse to your strength of will, and to wisdom; perhaps you will find in your husband such qualities as will endear him to you, especially if you have been blessed with children by him. In that case it is better to preserve the family structure for the children's sake. But if the matter
should grow so much worse as to become a danger to married life, then divorce is preferable.
Q — How can a woman know whether a man's intentions toward her are good or bad?
A — If a woman is alert and discerning, she can tell a man's intentions at once from his conduct with her, or his conversation with her, and from his treatment of her.
Q — What ought to be a woman's principal aim in life?
A — Frankly and briefly: her principal aim, in our rising society, must be marriage, that she may become the mother of noble, refined children for the new generation.
Q — Which music is better, in your opinion, the Western or the Eastern? And why?
A — There is no such thing as a Western music and an Eastern music. Music is one; only in the West it has reached a higher level than the level it has reached in the East. And this, we believe, no two people will dispute; there is therefore no need to recite the reasons.
Q — What is true love between a woman and a man?
A — True love is the exchange of that noble sentiment which the two lovers must join in nurturing and tending, so that its freshness
does not wither with the days. For love is like a flower: it needs constant care and tending, lest it fade and waste away.
Q — How can a woman keep a man's love for her?
A — In every man there is a boyish instinct. If a woman can discover it and humor it, she will keep her man's love for her all her life long.
Q — Which men are dearest to a woman?
A — The dearest of things to a woman is to feel a man's protection over her and his strength above her, for beside him she is like a child; hence by her very nature she takes comfort in his authority, and strives to please him by every means.
Q — What should be the attitude of a woman whose husband neglects her, turning away from her because of his many occupations and his dealings with people?
A — We do not believe, madam, that a husband will neglect his wife to the point of complaint and vexation, if she conducts herself well with him and knows how to make her companionship pleasing and enjoyable to him — showing her interest, for example, in the work he does, even if that demands effort and sacrifice of her.
womanhood not hindering them from joining battle and storming hardships.
The best of the ideals to which the new world looks up is order,
and the best soldier able to perform the task of trusty guardian over order is the girl — she is an effective member in the planting of the ideals, whether she be in her home, or her office, or her hospital, or any other occupation she has taken up.
And among the ideals aimed at by the lovers of peace is freedom of opinion, of thought, and of belief — and the fight against the enslavement of men by men.
Here is a field for the girl to take her share of the work. First of all, she must free herself from the traditions and illusions which in the past made of her a follower, not one followed. These traditions — and allow me to say also the religions — bound the girl with strangling bonds, which she accepted now under compulsion, now by choice, because the teachings of metaphysical philosophy planted in her an inner feeling of incompetence and of defeat — what is expressed in English as the Inferiority Complex. If
the girl does not free herself from this inner feeling, she will remain a secondary member of society. But the intellectual revolution of today has emboldened the girl, for whom it has become impossible to accept any wrong done to her, whether in rights or in duties. And duties, with the responsibilities that branch from them, are nothing but one of the rights of man; and the best of people is he whose responsibilities are many, and who bears them with gladness and courage.
In our Arab East there are the germs of malignant social diseases which must be uprooted — the germs of ignorance, illiteracy, sectarianism, feudalism, the multiplying of classes, and their like; and in such matters the working girl can make an effective contribution.
I say it to you once more, young woman: the new world lays upon you weighty responsibilities, no less than the responsibilities of the young man. If you bear their burdens, you will serve yourself, your sisters, and your country, and thereby the ideals we seek; and I can only think you will act — so that you reach your goal, and the new world welcomes your endeavor.
(From a lecture at the Cooperation Club in Beirut)