Can People Live Without Love?

There is nothing tangible that scientists can call "love," but these scientists have managed to establish certain facts about love, as a result of their wide studies of married life and of the relations of human beings with one another. After long researches they arrived at presenting a full report on this vital and important subject. Here are the most important conclusions on which they agreed:

What is love?

The most eloquent definition of love, in the scientists' view, is that of the poet Shelley, where he says:
"This burning, leaping emotion that we call love is not merely a general thirst for a union of the senses, but for a union of the whole nature: mind, imagination, and feeling..."

Can some people live without love?

No! For we were created with an insistent desire in our breasts to love and to be loved, and this desire must of necessity be fed by someone. Love and security — these two chief elements in the life of human beings — drive them to struggle and suffer for their attainment; no human being is content unless he has, in some corner of the earth, a companion with whom he finds rest, and who shares his joys and his sorrows.

Do most young people marry for love?

Fifty percent of girls marry for love; as for the other half, they enter married life for other reasons, the chief of which are: to secure an independent life, fear of growing old and failing to obtain a husband, and the desire to form a family and children... And woman is bolder than man in venturing upon such a dry marriage... In this case life becomes mechanical, and it rarely lasts long or is joined with mutual happiness!

Is it true that people love their opposites?

No! The notion has spread abroad that the tall man usually inclines toward the short girl, and that the blonde inclines toward the dark man... But the truth is that the tall dark man prefers, in his heart of hearts, the tall dark girl, and the fair man is usually more drawn to fair girls: every human being prefers his own likes, not his opposites.

Are the bonds of marriage strengthened when the man is the head?

It is preferable that a marriage be equal in its forces, built upon complete understanding, without the family having a head at all. But if there is no escaping someone's taking the reins of rule, then the man has a better claim to it than the woman; happiness is rarely achieved in the family in which the seat of authority belongs to the woman — then the man's pride is shattered, and it becomes very difficult for him to bring happiness to the heart of his mannish wife.

At what age is a woman or a man most disposed to fall in love?

A girl answers the call of love most between the ages of 16 and 20; a man, between 20 and 25. After that age young people's susceptibility to burning love diminishes; but this passion leaps up suddenly after the age of thirty, and it is said that a man can love at forty with a violence and a force he never felt in the dawn of his youth...

How many times do we love in our lives?

People are not all alike, but

the studies and statistics on this subject have reached the conclusion that a woman can love, during her youth, on an average of seven times, and a man six times. And there are persons whose figures rise or fall according to their susceptibility and their personal disposition.

Does love affect our bodily and mental condition?

Of course! Scientists have found that love is the greatest stimulant of the nervous system and an invigorator of the mental powers: it enables the person in love to accomplish great and mighty works which, outside the time of love, he finds very difficult.

How does failure in love affect our bodily condition?

Failure in love not only weakens the body's resistance; it causes many organic disturbances. The effect of failure in love upon our health is far beyond what we imagine... so much so that the number of deaths among disappointed lovers is double what it is among those who are happy and contented in love.

What makes us love?

From the age of adolescence on, every girl draws in her imagination a complete picture of the young man of her dreams; she is forever searching, in her conscious mind and her subconscious mind, for a young man in whom is found that collection of qualities which she has gathered from different sources, at different times, until there is fixed in her imagination a splendid picture of her awaited young man... And men of science have become certain that when a girl meets her young man and her golden dreams come true through marrying him, she lives with him a contented life enfolded in that lasting happiness which we rarely find between couples brought together by interest rather than by love and harmony of taste. And men of science give this assurance to the rising generation, saying:
"Beware of undertaking marriage for secondary considerations other than love and mutual spiritual understanding; for a marriage whose foundation is interest, or flight from single life, or fear of growing old and failing to obtain a husband — such a foundation is built upon sand, and it soon collapses, and the couple live in fog and misery, which before long lead to separation... So take your time, and do not undertake marriage until you have made certain that you have found what you were seeking — the young man of your dreams..."

What do we do if we suffer a blow in love with the young man of our dreams?

It is not easy to fail in love: such failure is like a stab to the very core, and the shock affects our physical and mental condition to a great degree. But the only method we must follow is to forget. Let us forget, whatever it may cost us! Let us throw ourselves with all our resolve into new work; let us travel — if possible — to a new country... and make the acquaintance of new people... Then we shall feel an energy that helps us greatly to find consolation and to forget...

And foolish is the person who supposes that he will never love a second love, and that there is no other person in the world whom he could love and who could suit his taste.

The fact is that there are tens — nay, hundreds — of persons who, were it given to us to keep company with them, we should find no less attractive than the one we loved. If we search with a will, we shall find a second person, and we shall overcome that feeling of failure which almost shattered our spirits and destroyed our health and our contentment...