"A Maze!..."

To Nazik's "Utopia"!

O maze of the dream — no, no dream in the dawn that looks down!
The horizons lie felled in its hushed, dreary wasteland,
and sorrow heaves up from every herald crying out,
and the unknown expanse lies in the mouth of fading extinction.
Despair has been forbidden — then why, O my bewilderment, am I denied my shadow?
How?... when the road offers no companion sheltering in its shade
How? — when estrangement does not pulse beyond the grove of my ignorance
How?... I cannot grasp it — leave me be, in my own solitary maze
Ah! for the bewilderment of my sighs in delusion that leads astray
Whenever I said "tomorrow is mine," the whole of me strayed in a part of me
And I wallowed in the mire of my sighs and my pleading
And disowned the phantoms of slow, sweet slumber
And my stupor?... at times I feed it the shallowness of my mind
And often I lavish the soul upon it, though I loathe all solace
And when my feet fall upon the crippled night
its sighs come back deformed to my abased hearing,
and beyond them a sound of sobbing, heedless, makes my burden heavier:
Ah, no — no dream for the deprived in the dawn that looks down.