The deepest desire in the soul of every girl is to obtain a suitable husband, and rarely does anyone depart from this general rule. It is human nature that gives girls this positive direction — a direction that often takes on a negative appearance, so that girls declare that they do not wish to marry, and proclaim at every turn their hatred of men... The psychologists pay these appearances no great regard, and affirm that they run counter to the desires for which the subconscious mind yearns...
What, one wonders, brings a woman to disown this desire — the loveliest thing her soul hovers about, and the thing that most constantly occupies her mind? Is it the pride in woman that sets her in this negative posture, if only in words — and then, between one night and the next morning, we find her become a sweetheart and a wife: her dreams come true, all her earlier declarations evaporate, and she forgets that once upon a time she used to claim that she loathed marriage, and loathed men!
Why does a woman put on this artificial mask, when she realizes the importance of marriage — that it is an impregnable shield protecting her in all walks of life — and when she feels, too, that her life without a husband is incomplete, indeed empty? That is why she is forever striving to fill this emptiness and complete this lack.
Yet in spite of this unceasing effort, wherever we go we find many, many girls still waiting... The years pass slowly, and most girls remain girls — often they become spinsters — while the men stay just as they are... There is much in this present state of things that is unnatural, and every girl can change her own position in it with a little tact and a little intelligence and knowledge.
In the old days, when a girl reached marriageable age she kept to her house, so that it might be said of her that she was chaste and modest, and she settled down to wait for the young man
of her dreams to knock at her father's door, asking for her hand, displaying more than the qualities he actually possessed, in order to find favor in the father's eye and in the girl's.
So our mothers married, and so our mothers want us to marry — not knowing that this age is not their age, that minds have changed, and that this change calls for a change in
the ways of marriage!
You may, Miss, be one of the sheltered daughters of the house, graced with many fine qualities, high breeding, and beauty. You may also have your share of vanity, and rate yourself above what you are... In any case, if you wish success in finding a husband to suit you, you must acquaint yourself with the truths and the secrets this age demands — so listen!
We know many girls who married excellent young men, while others far better than they still remain in deprivation and loneliness. This fact often puzzles us! But married girls rarely tell of the means they used to win their men! And the reasons remain a riddle!
It is entirely natural for girls to incline to the company of men, and there is no fault in that. When you are in the company of a well-bred young man, and feel that you like him to some degree, be gentle and gracious, show your interest in him, and listen to his talk with all attention, for that raises you in his eye.
And your outward appearance — every aspect of it — must be cared for. It is not enough for the dress to be pretty and clean; cleanliness must extend to your hair, your neck, and your whole body. Many a young man has left his girl because she took too little care over her cleanliness or the neatness of her dress. So remember this always!
And you would do well to know, Miss, that men generally incline to dark
colors; black, most of the time, is preferred by them above all others. So take care to keep a black dress for special occasions,
People are agreed that happiness is harder to attain when husband and wife are under the age of twenty. The most suitable age for a girl is between 21 and 25, and the most suitable age for a man is around thirty; experience has shown that man and woman in this period are nearer to maturity, and more ready to welcome a happy married life, than at any other age.
A special study was made of 409 married couples of various ages, and it appeared that those among them who were under twenty met with great hardship in passing from the free, independent life of the single state to the married life bound by heavy responsibilities, and that they took a long while before they were able to adjust themselves to these developments and changes...