During the days of engagement, the young man exerts his utmost effort to appear before his fiancée in the nearest semblance of perfection, whether in outward appearance or in good conduct. He is well-groomed, striving always to be the knight every girl dreams of — his own girl above all. And he goes to great lengths, on the other hand, in attending to his girl's affairs, giving close attention to the small details that concern her. He welcomes her warmly, standing on his feet; he hastens to carry her coat, opens the car door for her, and stands a moment until she is settled in her seat, before entering unhurriedly and sitting down beside her...

And the girl does the like of this and more. She watches her fiancé's every movement and stillness, to deduce from them what should and should not be done, and she carries out his will to the letter. If the girl senses that her fiancé prefers a certain kind of perfume, she hastens to use it. She is always gentle and refined, fully prepared to answer his wishes...

Yet this conduct rarely continues beyond a short while after marriage; its place is taken by a measure of neglect and indifference — especially on the husband's side.

We do not claim that these small details of family manners are the foundation of the happy marriage; rather we believe they are a strong pillar for building the family and securing its happiness. How many a small attention has erased great offenses and firmed the pillars of a marriage after it had been threatened with collapse.

For the sake of your happiness, madam, we are concerned to point out to you things a wife commits without realizing the extent of their ill effect on her husband's nerves and, consequently, on his behavior. First, then, what you must avoid doing:

1 – Do not use his things and then neglect to return them tidily to their place.

2 – Do not tidy his library and leaf through his papers without his knowledge, for this work of yours may vex

him more than it comforts him.

3 – In the course of conversation, do not correct his speech in front of people or press for details — even children are scolded for such intrusion.

4 – Do not ask his help in some matter at the hour when he is worn out over his papers.

5 – Do not speak to strangers of your private family affairs.

6 – Do not dispose of his newspapers and his mail before he has finished looking through them.

7 – Do not trouble his rest with news of the servants if you can solve the problem by yourself. As for the things it is well for you to do to refresh your married life, they are:

1 – Take his opinion before deciding on your social engagements — visits, receptions, and the like.

2 – Be exact and diligent in carrying out his personal tasks, such as sending his suit to be cleaned, ironing his shirts, darning his socks, etc. These are the wife's duties and must be done without delay or dawdling.

3 – Listen to his remarks on household matters, for most often he has a sound reason for these remarks which you would do well not to overlook.

4 – Do not appear at the breakfast table except in complete attire that rests his eyes.

5 – Welcome him warmly when he returns in the evening from his work, and lavish on him a special tenderness, to renew his love for you.

6 – Prepare for him with your own hands, from time to time, a dish he loves — let him sense in this taste your breath which he loves, so that his bond with you grows stronger and his appreciation of your sacrifices is doubled...

7 – Give him absolute freedom in his private doings, and be always calm of nerves and composed.

It is a common thing in our homes that the man is more neglectful of these matters than the woman; but the wife who persists in observing these courtesies between herself and her husband will, without doubt, bring him to regard her feelings and to imitate her time after time, until these ways become an ingrained habit in his nature, practiced of his own will without his being conscious of it — and thus they lead to his happiness, and to the ideal married life.