Are You in Perfect Harmony with Yourself?!

It has been the custom, from of old, for the merchant at the start of the year to take stock of all his assets and liabilities, and to inquire minutely into what caused his profit or his loss throughout the past year, then to decide, in the light of the results of those detailed inquiries, his plans of action for the coming year. This custom is no longer confined to merchants alone; most heads of enterprises, of whatever kind, have come to follow it too, as a measure of progress and a spur to continued growth and advancement.

My aim this evening is to draw your attention, my dear reader, to a storehouse of your very own which it would be well to inventory, surveying its contents at the start of this new year; for this storehouse contains the most precious jewels you have and the finest treasures you possess, since it is the faithful abode of all your thoughts, your feelings, and your reflections. Will you not sit with me a while, so that together we may review that collection of thoughts and reflections which make up your person, with a view to arriving at a means of assuring your continued inner growth?

The first question I want to put to you is this: Are you in perfect harmony with yourself? Are you entirely satisfied with all your conduct and with every feeling that stirs within you? Or are there certain habits that sometimes trouble you, because they show you before your friends and companions in a light other than the one you desire, so that you suffer greatly from their presence, believing there is no way to overcome them — since you were stamped with these habits from the moment you were formed, and have only to accept them as a fixed, unchanging part of yourself? But I bring you good news: scientific experiments have proved that the very paths that lead a person to develop a habit are themselves the means by which that habit is abolished. You can therefore overcome the traits you do not want, if you follow the plan I shall now help you to draw up and begin to carry out.

Take a pencil and paper, and come, let us begin. First, make a list of the qualities you do not want. Analyze yourself thoroughly, and be frank and sincere in your analysis; do not be ashamed, for no one will see the list but you. Here are a number of undesirable qualities to help you in this task: lack of patience in bearing difficulties, lack of steadiness in work, nervous fits of every kind, hot temper, irascibility, disregard for the feelings of others, lack of tact, fear, excessive shyness, pride, indifference, envy, hatred, anger, encroachment upon the rights of others — and more besides.

Second: after you have analyzed yourself carefully, choose, from among the qualities you find, the one you wish to be rid of first. Put a mark beside it, for identifying the fault and becoming alert to it is a necessary first step toward getting rid of it. Remember how often you have heard people talking about others and saying: What a great personality that lady would have, were it not for her constant criticism of others and her haughtiness toward them; or, If only that beautiful lady could take an interest in people and their affairs — she lives only for herself; or, If only I could restrain myself from anger and handle matters with calm nerves and deliberation; or, If that girl could speak in a softer voice and a gentler tone in company, people's admiration for her would be great — and so on without end, with "if only" and "would that." These habits, to which we rarely pay serious heed, may succeed in tinting our personality with colors our companions do not find pleasing, so that they draw away from us little by little without either of us being aware of it.

We have only to become alert to them, resolve to uproot them, and replace them with contrary habits that add luster and radiance to our personality, instead of blotting out its light.

Third: if, while reviewing the qualities you wish to replace, you find among the qualities you have set down on your list one that cannot be overcome — either because it is physiological, the result of some illness, or for any other reason — then accept it and pay it no heed. Remember that many people succeed in developing pleasing, attractive personalities despite a physiological defect, provided they accept that defect without complaint, forget its existence, and devote their efforts to developing in themselves qualities that make their companions forget, too, that any defect is there.

Fourth: do not let fears and illusions, or a feeling of inferiority, or excessive shyness, or any feeling that you are beneath other people, master your thinking and rob you of the pleasure and gaiety of life. Cast these illusions behind you, where they will lie buried, known and felt by no one, until the days erase them from your imagination.

Fifth: beware of self-pity. Do not wail or bemoan your ill fortune, and do not dwell upon the misfortunes that have befallen you. And take care never to try to draw attention to yourself as a way of covering some fault or deficiency that may lurk within you. It is better to develop

in yourself qualities that draw people to you by the power of a personal charm they cannot ignore or overlook. These attractive qualities you will find in the world of self-forgetfulness and of thinking of others: once you have forgotten yourself and lost it in the society you love and serve, you will find that the self you lost has been found and loved by others. Whoever has the gift of giving — of giving generously of oneself — has no need to brood over a feeling of inferiority, or to be led into childish behavior for the sake of attracting people's notice.

Sixth: do not let the memory of your past mistakes and losses live with you. Do not speak of them and do not think of them; remember that nature has blessed you with the gift of forgetting, so use it. Master your thoughts, and whenever you find yourself dwelling on calamities whose memory pains you, turn your thoughts at once to drawing new plans for the future, with which to rebuild whatever those painful events may have torn down. And remember that a person is defeated only when he himself admits that he is defeated! Training the self to forget is as necessary as training it to remember, provided one chooses well what ought to be forgotten.

Seventh: give yourself everything it needs for a healthy, balanced life. Provide yourself with sufficient rest, tranquil sleep, suitable food, and physical exercise in the fresh air, and refresh your spirit in all sorts of ways; you will then find that irascibility, nervous agitation, illusions, and anger no longer have any place in your personality, for strong, sound health is the only guarantee of keeping the personality strong and sound.

Eighth: you must remember that the balanced personality rests on four pillars in life: work, love, play, and true faith in human nature.

Work is a great field for the useful employment of the bodily and mental powers, allowing a person to reach that world of spiritual contentment which one enjoys after completing one's work well.

Love is that magical feeling that moves a person to give generously the finest and noblest treasures of the soul. And the wondrous power of love makes him perceive what he could never perceive without it: that true happiness lies in generous giving, in which is the utmost contentment and peace.

Play is a remedy for a great number of ailments of the soul, and it is capable of healing many of the wounds that life leaves within us.

As for faith in human nature, it is the only weapon by which deadly pessimism can be routed. It can overcome dejection, fears, terror, remorse, and despair.

Let these four pillars, then — work, love, play, and faith in human nature — accompany you through all the stages of your life, and hold fast to them always, however circumstances may turn against you and whatever difficulties and hardships you may meet.

If you apply this program which we have drawn up together now, with sincerity, courage, and steadfastness, and if you are confident that you can attain the personality you wish to be, then rest fully assured that it will not be long before you are entirely satisfied with the self that is you. And once you are in perfect harmony with yourself, be sure that you are in harmony with the whole world!!