The Memoirs of the Duchess of Windsor — The Ninth Installment

— The Ninth Installment —

What will be the fate of our love, now that David has become King?!

The Prince says in his memoirs:

On the afternoon of Thursday, January 16, I was out with my companions on a hunting expedition when an urgent message reached me from my mother, saying that my father was ill; she could not gauge the extent of the danger, but Lord Dawson was not easy about the outcome... and so she was calling me to come to the palace, without drawing my father's attention to it...

It so happened that I was at the Fort when he came in, this message in his hand; he passed it to me without uttering a word, then disappeared, and afterward I heard him ask that his airplane be made ready the next morning... I returned home after bidding him goodbye, and he telephoned me that evening to say that his father was on the mend and his condition gave no cause for alarm whatever... But the next day he called again to say that the King was on his deathbed and might die within a day or two, and that he himself had to go to the Prime Minister to inform him of the matter... On Monday evening I was watching a film when suddenly the lights on the screen went out, and this announcement appeared in bold letters: "The King's life now rests in the grasp of his Maker." The news struck deep into my soul...

When I reached home after midnight, I heard the telephone ringing in my room, and when I took up the receiver, David's voice came from the other end, saying: It is all over. I said nothing but "I am sorry"; as for him, he went on talking in agitation — everything was in ferment and unrest... but he told me he was going to London in the morning and would call me from there... Only when I put the receiver back in its place did I realize that the Prince had become King...

And David did indeed come to London, to attend the first ceremony of his accession to the throne; afterward he telephoned me, and his voice came weary as I had never known it before, and I wished I could help him; but that was not possible, least of all at that particular moment. And it happened, while I was watching one of the celebrations of the new King's crowning... that I was thunderstruck to find David at my side! To explain the secret of his conduct to his attendants he said: I like to watch the ceremony for myself... And when the last carriage passed out of sight, I felt tears sliding down from my eyes; I could scarcely believe that all this was for him... and he, beside me, was deeply moved... While we were going down the stairs together, I thanked him for inviting me and for his special attention to me, particularly now that he had entered a world entirely different from mine; but he pressed my arm, repeating: Yes, it is another world, but it will not have the power to change my feeling for you... Then he vanished like a mirage...

The days went by, and I would hear from David a hurried word or a rushed note, while the palace was in mourning; and I thought that our going out together to restaurants, and the "weekend" holidays, were over... he could no longer behave like an ordinary man... he was the King!...

I felt a deadly loneliness, but I hid my feeling, for there was nothing else I could do... In this period the subject of the Prince's marriage was raised — he had now become King, and the people followed his news and awaited the happy event with the utmost impatience. He had told me of his parents' eagerness to raise the subject: his mother would remind him once every year of the matter of his marriage, and though she never spoke of it in plain terms, she would hint from time to time that it had become necessary for her son to settle down with a suitable woman of his own choosing. He would avoid going into the subject, and put it off whenever it was raised. But it had become impossible for him, now that he was King, to ignore the reality — especially since the King's first duty is to provide the throne with a legitimate heir...

I waited for the day to come that would put an end to my rosy dream, and I refused to believe it, for in my heart of hearts I felt an obscure longing driving me to undertake any task, however hard...

Ernest, meanwhile, had gone off to New York, and I do not deny that he found a woman who took an interest in him; I learned of it through a letter that reached my hands by mistake, when he was the one who was meant to receive it... It became only natural that the outer shell we had built around our marriage should crack... And I began to think of divorcing Ernest, to clear the way for him to build a new life, and so that I might follow the path of my appointed destiny.

I wanted the divorce through legal channels, and I had no friend I trusted more than David; he refused to exert any influence in the matter, and left me to do what I believed to be right.

The divorce was taking its course, and I drew closer and closer to the King's life. Every evening, on his way back to the palace, he would stop at my house and come in to drink a glass, talk a few minutes, and then go on his way... His talk was always of his kingdom, which he loved; he kept thinking of everything that might raise it up and strengthen it, and he wanted to make things new — and was met head-on by reaction and the coldness of tradition.

One day in May of that year, we were walking in the garden of the castle when he mentioned to me that he had invited the Prime Minister to dinner that evening; then he went on to say: The day must come when he makes the acquaintance of my wife... For the first time I heard him give voice to what was in his mind, and with such frankness. For everything under heaven there is a season. And the season of David's marriage had come...

I answered him sharply: No... do not speak of this... they will not allow you... it is impossible.

I helped him prepare the dinner; then Ernest and I were among the guests. And I was the object of silent questioning... Every one of the guests kept trying to let a question slip... then his will would master him and bridle his tongue from speaking... And I remember, too, that it was the last time I appeared with Ernest.

David was thinking of the summer holiday, and thought of spending it in France, but the disturbances that had broken out among its people made him give up the idea, so he chartered a yacht to cruise the Mediterranean... On this voyage I had proof of David's stubbornness twice. The first time was as we were passing through the Corinth Canal on our way to Athens: the weather was fine, and David came out onto the deck of the yacht wearing shorts and no shirt; the people on the shore scowled, the photographers' lenses were aimed at us, and he stayed as he was, despite the displeasure of the attendants, who did not relish the idea of their King appearing before the public without a shirt.

The second time was when David was invited to dinner in a public café, and his acceptance roused the indignation of the royalists...

We continued our voyage to Istanbul, where we were fêted by Kemal Atatürk, whom I admired to a very great degree... We left the yacht in the waters of the Bosphorus and traveled in Atatürk's private train to Vienna; those were happy days, and we pressed every sweetness out of them. In Zurich we parted: David flew to London, and I went on to Paris to buy some clothes and necessities. I had not been two days in Paris when I received some letters containing clippings from the New York papers, which had begun to ask about Mrs. Simpson — and what was her part in the King's life?

At first I was stunned, and everything grew confused for me; and when David spoke to me that day, I told him of the subject that had become a morsel in the mouths of the press; but he turned me away from it, and persuaded me it was mere gossip, not worth discussion or dispute.