Advice for God's Sake!.. How to Be Cured of Love?

You are attached to your sweetheart; you cannot part from her, and you cannot imagine life without her... In your eyes she is the most beautiful girl in the world, and no other beauty equals her in the loveliness of her face, the grace of her figure, and her charm — not to mention what distinguishes her in wit and delicacy, in fidelity and chastity, and in all the virtues of women together, which have gathered in her and centered themselves in her beloved person!

If your girl laughs, the world laughs for you; and if her face lights up with a smile, the sun rises with it — after dawn breaks from her lips and the light of day shines from her eyes?

And if your girl frowns or scowls, the whole world is scowling, all of life is frowning and desolate, the world is dark and gloomy, and all people ought to weep instead of laugh!

But..?

Is your girl truly as beautiful as you imagine? And does the beauty that shows itself to you show itself to everyone who sees her?

Have you ever thought of looking at your beloved with people's eyes rather than your own — that is, without the film of love, or the spectacles of sentiment? Indeed, leave aside people's eyes in general... and look at her with the eye of another girl of her own sex; for none criticizes a woman like a woman, and none knows the faults of women like women.

Then suppose you were not a lover, smitten, nor an adoring, lovesick sweetheart; and imagine, for instance, that you are a father asking for this girl's hand for his young son. Would she satisfy you? Would you choose her? Has she not a fault, or faults, which she tries to hide from you, but which you know full well, deceiving yourself about them and shutting your eyes to their existence?

And yet... let me be: I will walk along with you in your love, and grant you your passion. I too will suppose that your beloved is the beauty queen of the world, and the queen of wit and charm, delicacy and gentleness, in this world and the next as well... and that she has no faults at all, neither in face, nor in figure, nor in character, nor in disposition.

Let us suppose all that... Does she love you as you love her? And if she loves you, is her love of the firm, settled kind that endures through time, and that will make her accept life with you, its sweet and its bitter alike?..

The word "love" carries the meaning of exchange. If love is not mutual between you and your beloved, then turn your back on her and look for another — for the one who loves you as you love her, and values you as you value her. For she who refuses your love is not worthy of you!

"Lynn Merrick"
Columbia star