My Mother

I love her with reverence — that mother of boundless sublimity, of infinite tenderness: my mother. She is the most precious of pearls and sweeter than honey. My heart seeks love from her holy heart — but what a distance lies between them... My heart is powerless to grasp the symbols of the mother and her greatness.

The whole universe is filled with the fragrance of her perfumed breaths, and confesses her existence! She is a ray of hope in the pitch darkness; she is balm, and desire, and hope; she is heart's core and being, and more needful than the soul; she is a spring overflowing with sweetness, delicacy, and grace; she is a pearl and a jewel without alloy; she is the most precious blessing God has bestowed upon mankind, a holy spirit He fashioned to add beauty and perfection to the world.

In vain do I try to praise her, for she is a mother, and the loftiest epithets perish beneath her feet!! Many a time have I gone deep into her inmost being, questioning in a whisper her beating, forgiving heart, hoping to win her essence and clasp her soul, that I might rise to her rank and we might understand one another... I asked for tenderness, and she sent up from her depths a spark to light my heart; she turned my soul to stillness and gravity, and lavished upon me all knowledge, together with an intoxicating breath of her sweetness. And yet... I understood nothing; so I trembled, and nearly went mad, and fled.

O wondrous creature! In the heights an angel flies and sings your melodies; and I listen to his sweet strain, for it is mellow and true, while the melodies of men are cunning selfishness.

O astonishing mother! Ah, how many hardships she has borne for our sake; how often she has sat wakeful beside our bed, weeping when we wept, rejoicing when we granted her a smile. It was she who taught us the meaning of existence and of thought, who guided us to truths and virtues, and who laid upon us the love of the Creator, of the homeland, of kinsfolk and friends.

Family cares have weighed her life down with sharp pain, have woven her nights with somber forebodings, and have drawn over her eyes a film the color of white marble, from the endless surging of hot tears.

Ah! Time has its turnings, and life its arts and its kinds! And the mother is the most wretched of creatures. It was decreed that my mother should live out her old age between calms and storms that rock her thoughts and shake her heart in waves unceasing; and yet she struggles on, and cherishes, and forgives, embracing patience, and committing all things to the Being who is able.

Her utmost wish is to see her child strong, refined, honored, far from dangers; she follows him with her mind wherever he turns; and whether he be harsh or tender, far or near, foolish or wise — it is all one, for her gentle heart stays clear, and gives, and loves, though it be worn away beneath the weight of pain.

In my mother's countenance speak majesty, the ideal, and piety. She rises a little before dawn and perfumes the world with her fervent prayers for our happiness. Would that she might give me one atom of her faith, and teach me true prayer, so that whenever my prayer rises to the heights for her sake, my Lord might hearken to it!! Every smile, every word, every flash of anger of my mother's fills my heart with love and brims it with rapture! And I wish that she might take of my life and of my strength, that I might see her forever renewed in life, radiant of brow, by grace of my love and my offering. Then would my soul grow the sweeter in its depths. And there, in that sacrifice, lies the paradise of eternity!

O God! Fill my heart with the love of my mother; make my days consecrated to her service; and grant me her contentment and her blessing. O God! Preserve her from every harm, keep evil far from her, and bless her. I bow myself before her good and mighty heart! And Thou, my God — Thou alone dost surpass her in my worship, my love, and my awe; and my soul rises only when it plunges down and finds its way into her depths, and kisses them!

I shall stay alive, and sing always, and my soul will fear no sudden blow, so long as my mother is in this world.