Childhood, Too, Has Its Miseries

Understanding and love work to help adolescents and children through the difficulties that confront them.

Ten thousand years from now, when wise children excavate the city of the twentieth century, they will arrive at an astonishing conclusion, which comes down to this: the children of this generation did not know responsibility for themselves — and so a number of grown-ups think today.

They will say: "Look at Layla, screaming to go out every night to a party or the cinema, and she does not help her mother wash the dishes and clean the house. Look at Samir, roaming the neighborhoods on his bicycle. He will never be good for anything."

This age is not given over to play alone; it is the period of mental growth, in which the young person receives lectures, sermons, and threats, while obstacles and difficulties confront him that he struggles to get past. Our children know that they are weak and without experience, looking out upon a new world full of surprises and strange information; and standing where they stand, all manner of temptations, abundant dangers, and numerous occasions face them which their parents never had the chance to know. So a violent conflict rages within them, in which desire and disorder contend — and despite all this, we still believe that youth is the happiest stage of life!!!

Youth is not a happy period, for the fog of doubt and fear covers it, jealousy and loneliness hem it in, and distraction and misery born of ignorance and inexperience pierce it through. And to all that we add our threats and warnings, which make the child turn a deaf ear to everything and continue along the path he has taken.

Childhood needs gentleness and tenderness, and a devoted hand to lead it into the world of grown-ups, keeping faith with it through every obstacle it runs against.

"What is this sudden change in your daughter, Salwa? Has that beloved child become so disobedient and rebellious?" Talk of this kind will do nothing to change her conduct. The sensible, effective way in this situation is to make the girl feel your devotion to her and your affection, and then to recount the memories of your own life in her hearing — how you fought difficulties and triumphed over them.

And you, father — allow your son to enjoy at home the freedom and gaiety his young soul longs for. Let him go out, but under your supervision and guidance, without heavy pressure or surveillance; otherwise he will rebel and remind you that you were once fifteen and sixteen years old!! Talk to him about your school days, about the games you used to love, and the bonds of friendship between you will grow firm.

Our children are our own selves at the age of youth. Let us remember what confronted us in those days, the falls and the aspirations, and let us think always that the bond which ties us and them together in closeness and harmony is love — and love alone!