Story of the Month: The Runaway Husband

... After a long absence, Miss Samira Azzam returns to publishing her stories in The Woman's Voice.

And as we welcome her return with the warmest of welcomes, we count Miss Azzam in the front rank of those who have served the Arabic story and helped to revive it, pulsing with life, keeping pace with the spirit of the age.

The conduct of Tommy Simmons with his wife was the wonder of the whole quarter, and of the women above all; for Simmons was more obedient to his wife than her own fingertips, and weaker before her than a small child, and the women of the quarter had known nothing from their men but harshness of treatment and excess of domineering.

This Mrs. Simmons, before she made the acquaintance of Tommy Simmons — an acquaintance that ended in marriage — had been the widow of a man called Bob Ford. Ford had once gone to sea in a ship which the storms toyed with and sank, and the news reached Mrs. Ford of her husband's death; so she refrained from marrying for years, until the fates threw poor Simmons in her path, and she knew how to make of him a husband docile and meek as a lamb, whose character knew no road to rebellion, and who could do nothing but submit to the wishes of his dictator wife without condition or restriction.

Among the manifestations of this submission: he hands her his wages entire at the end of every week, and keeps for himself only what his wife allows.

She succeeded in getting him to give up smoking, on the plea that it harmed his precious health — though had she been fair she would have said that the harm was to the pocket, not to the health. What is more, by her firmness she was able to make of him a helper who tends with her to the affairs of the house whenever leisure allows him — washing the floor-tiles and the doors every Saturday evening, cleaning the tea things and setting them in order, and carrying the parcels whenever she goes out to buy something from the market.

Mrs. Simmons is a woman who worships cleanliness: it is a fourth impossibility that she should allow her husband to cross the threshold of the door in his shoes; rather he must take them off at the top of the stairs and then enter the house to put on a house slipper.

There remained the matter of the husband's clothes, and these too fell within her sphere of authority. He must wear everything she buys him, according to her inclination and her taste and the measure her hand permits; for she knows better how to buy and is abler at bargaining. Would that she had stopped there — but she came out with a new innovation when it caught her eye one day that he needed new trousers. She said that she would stop buying ready-made clothes, it having become clear to her that the sellers were nothing but a band who held it lawful to cheat people and extort their money; and she resolved from that day to sew his trousers for him herself. And Mrs. Simmons was never lazy in carrying out whatever projects her genius mind hatched: she surprised her husband the following week by handing him something resembling a sack and ordering him to put it on as trousers.

There is no doubt the trousers came out looking comical on the husband's body, and when Tommy contemplated himself before the mirror and saw his body in this strange attire he was on the verge of weeping; but a single look from Anna restored his senses, so he swallowed his spittle and kept silent.

And would that this had been the last of the innovations! A few days later she issued him a new administrative order decreeing that she herself would undertake the cutting of the hair of his head, since she was skilled at such work, and there was no need for him to lavish his bounties on the barber — she had more right to the money than he. Nor did the woman lack speed of execution: quickly he emerged from between her hands with his head very like the body of a sheep overtaken by the shearing. And he did not dare open his mouth with one word of objection. Had he done so, he would have heard from her a phonograph record whose gist was that she wears herself out for his sake, tends his house and cooks his food and sews his clothes and saves him every penny — and is this ingratitude to be her reward from him? Yes, he knew beforehand what she would say, and so by silence he spared himself the hearing of this oration.

One evening Simmons was alone in the house, his cherished spouse having gone out to the market after charging him to do certain tasks and ordering him to try on his new trousers during her absence.

And when he contemplated it in fury, he found in himself the courage to say:

"Better I should throw it in the rubbish box — that's the place that befits it."

Nor did he forget to glance about for fear some person might hear him, and he should get from Anna a rebuke he would not like. After that Tommy heard a light knocking at the door, and he hastened to open the door to the knocker — and behold, he saw a thin man with his hands in his trouser pockets. No sooner had Simmons caught sight of him than the question was put:

"Isn't this the dwelling of Mrs. Ford?"

Simmons stared at him a moment, then said: "What?" And the stranger answered: "Mrs. Ford — or Mrs. Simmons, as they call her now."

"Ah — no, she is not in at present."

"Good. I take it you are her new husband, is that not so?"

"Yes."

The man drew his pipe from his mouth and stared a little at Simmons and said: "I was able to tell that from your general appearance." Simmons was irked by the man's impudence, and it seemed he was about to shut the door, when the strange man set his foot to prevent him, saying:

"Don't be hasty. I have come to talk with you as man talks with man."

"Who are you? I don't know you."

"Ah, true. Then permit me to introduce myself to you. I am Bob Ford." He said it, bowing a bow tinged with some mockery, then added: "I did not die as was rumored of me. I had the luck of escape, and I have come to see my wife, and to talk with you a little."

Simmons's mouth gaped in astonishment, his lower jaw dropping in a comical way... And the man spoke again: "I have come to talk with you both — won't you invite me in?" Simmons closed his mouth and stepped aside from the entrance with a mechanical motion to allow the man to go up, and went up behind him while thoughts pulled him this way and that. Here was Ford appearing on the stage — who could have reckoned on this? And then, what if the man demanded his wife? Would that be by way of a crushing blow to him? Or not? But let him first ask himself: is he happy in his life with Anna?

And he thought quickly of the tasks he performs — of scrubbing the floor and the dishes, of polishing the glass, of the comical trousers she undertakes to sew for him, of the cutting of the hair of his head at her hands, of... and of... And the thread of his racing thoughts was cut by the man's voice asking, once he had settled himself in place:

"Will Anna's return be long?"

"About half an hour."

Ford let his eyes rove about the place, saying: "Ah, here I am again," and threw himself onto the nearest seat and set about filling his pipe. Simmons looked at him with disapproval and said that she allows no one to smoke here.

"Sorry — I know Anna. How have you found her, for heaven's sake? Does she order you to clean the dishes?"

"I... I help her sometimes."

"And polish the floor and the glass? I'll swear you do."

Ford fell to contemplating Simmons, then spoke again: "And your hair? I suppose she does the cutting of it for you."

"Yes — I know that too; that is her custom. And what are these trousers hanging up? Yours, no doubt, and sewn with her own hands. Yes, yes, she is still just as I knew her, for she has changed nothing of her strange ways..." And Simmons grew weary of the man's comments, and began to curse his appearance for disturbing him in this fashion. And he began to reckon the account of the problem that would arise the moment Anna arrived. Let him take her if he wished — he would not much regret his life bound by strict laws and orders. But what would Anna's position on it be? That is what he wanted to know.

And Ford spoke again: "It is a surprise, naturally, for you; but I have not come to spoil your life on you. She is your wife now, and any sum from you will suffice to keep me far away from you both. Fifty pounds, say." Tommy did not at first blush understand what the man meant, but after a while he grasped what he was driving at, and his head jerked up in protest. What? Is he to pay him fifty pounds to leave Anna to him, when he does not possess fifty pence?... No, no — let the two of them go to the devil; he is not sorry for either of them.

And he turned to Ford, saying: "Thank you, thank you. I... I mean... I mean that I—"

"What? Did you find the sum too great?... No matter — I am prepared to come down a little."

"Oh, that is noble of you — that is humanity. But I only wanted to say that she was your wife before she became my wife. I do not like to usurp your rights. I am prepared to withdraw. Yes, I shall go." And Simmons took a step toward the door, whereupon Ford rose to stop him, saying:

"Don't rush matters. Think a little what a loss you would suffer, when you know no house but this and no woman but Anna. I did not come here for us to quarrel. Let me make you understand my meaning first."

And at that moment there reached their ears the sound of a violent knocking at the door, and Ford cried out: "Who is that?"

Simmons answered: "Let me see who is coming." And he went down the stairs and hurried to open the door — and behold, Anna received him with a flood of her scolding for his slowness in opening the door, laden as she was with the parcels. But Simmons paid her no heed; he pushed her out of his way and shot off into the street while she shouted at him in fury:

"Where to? How can you go out without a hat, you fool!"

And he answered her without turning around: "Never mind, Anna. Go on up to the house — there is a person waiting for you." Ford at that instant was watching the scene from the head of the stairs, and no sooner did he see Simmons taking to his heels than he hurried down the stairs in three leaps that brought him to the door, and burst through it and out, without giving Anna the chance to make him out... leaving her with her eyes opened wide in the utmost amazement and stupefaction.