Woman After Forty — From a Talk by Dr. Edma Abouchdid

... Of the earliest vanguard: Dr. Edma Abouchdid. The first girl to mount the platform of the American University of Beirut to receive the diploma of medicine... Between that era and our own day she has covered long stretches in the fields of specialization and of renown. From medicine's branching fields she chose the field of woman, and in its cause she traveled to New York, then to Paris and London, seeking out the newest that science has attained, to ease the role of motherhood, to explore its obstacles and its secrets, and to raise woman up in all the stages of her life — sound of body and mind, worthy of watching tenderly over the offspring: the hope of tomorrow...

Dr. Edma Abouchdid's name shone forth after years of practice in Baghdad, and on her fell the choice of the Lebanese government to represent her country at the world congress on sterility... She is now a professor at the Faculty of Medicine of the American University of Beirut, apart from her flourishing activity in her private clinic.

Beside this excellence in the field of medicine, Dr. Abouchdid has all the qualities of the complete "lady." Her home — every corner of it — is a model of refined elegance. Her hands are of gold, working at the prompting of her mind and her taste, and never wearying: between sewing and cooking and the arranging of flowers — what art of the modern home does this much-occupied doctor not master?? Do not ask me how her time can suffice... every minute of her life is accounted for, and none is squandered. Is she not, after all, a woman who is a pride to our world... and an example?

It pleases us to record here with Dr. Edma Abouchdid a talk on "Woman After Forty" — and who is fitter than she to treat this delicate subject? Let us listen as she says: "The phrase 'middle age' has vanished from the modern woman's lexicon."

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Q — What is the cause of the fear and despair that take possession of a woman's soul after the age of forty?

A — There are several causes, the chief among them being the feeling of emptiness; the feeling that a woman has come within sight of the autumn of her life, and that her task in life has nearly reached its end. Her children have gone out into the world and no longer need her, and here she is, threatened at every moment with illness and collapse.

Q — And must these fears beset every woman and rob her of sleep in the period after forty?

A — No. Some women pass through this stage calmly and without the least bodily or health disturbance — that depends on the woman's own nature and on the circumstances surrounding her. Whenever abnormal symptoms appear, the wise course is to go back to the family doctor, to have the causes of these symptoms diagnosed and to receive guidance and counsel on what should be done. The important thing is for the woman to grasp that whatever comes over her is only a passing thing; it will vanish after a while, and the waters will return to their courses with a little positive will and a family cooperation built on love and understanding.

Q — Where does modern thinking stand regarding the period of "middle age" in woman?

A — I can say this: the phrase "middle age" has vanished from the modern woman's lexicon. Modern thinking turns toward uncovering the latent possibilities — ideas, feelings, and vital forces that can be set free — turning the woman's thought away from her condition toward a lofty aim, by which she triumphs over her passing weakness and returns to her former self.

Q — On whom does the chief responsibility in this fall?

A — On the woman herself, without a doubt — for this age of ours is an age of emancipation, and she must be brave and decide her destiny for herself, not letting flimsy traditions hold her back from reaching her goals — bending aside with them in surrender.

The woman must make herself ready, bodily and mentally, to face this real transitional stage — it is like the stage through which we passed from adolescence to maturity — and we must adjust ourselves within the family and social setting with full awareness and deliberation.

Q — And how should a woman look upon this transitional stage?

A — Once a woman has passed forty, she must first of all think with the mind, not with the emotions. If any changes come over her, they do not come suddenly; they proceed gradually, according to a slow natural order. The bodily change may be accompanied by a development in feeling, so that a woman sometimes feels herself thirsting for tears, and weeps without cause — there is nothing strange in that and nothing to fear: tears are a means of easing the soul. And a woman may find herself anxious over the most trifling causes, flaring up at her husband, scolding the children, and falling upon the maid!

Q — And is there a physiological cause for this behavior?

A — Of course. The changes are accompanied by an internal upheaval: the ovarian secretion lessens, which in turn affects the pituitary glands, whose secretion increases a little; and this in turn leaves its mark on the thyroid glands; the heartbeat quickens and the perspiration pours. In short, the glands fall into a state of disorder and imbalance — and this is the cause of the mental disturbances and of the jarring of the nervous system, which shows itself in the form of emotional outbursts. And during the cessation of the menses there sometimes appears a degree of irritation or inflammation, and vaginal bleeding may occur, followed by emotional effects that are hard to bridle.

Q — And what is the way to limit these symptoms and disturbances?

A — There are soothing remedies that modern medicine has placed at woman's service, to be taken on her doctor's direction, together with certain "hormones," as soon as she feels these agitations... and she continues with this until she has crossed this stage in safety and peace.

Q — And as an experienced doctor, what daily program of living do you advise a woman to follow?

A — In this transitional stage a woman must avoid bodily exhaustion of whatever kind — and then strenuous, nerve-straining work, rich foods, and too little sleep. And do not forget, my sister, to exercise in moderation, for body and mind are then laboring together, continuously, toward the entry into a new phase. Perhaps the best positive result in ordering your time is to divide your day in thirds: eight hours for work, eight hours for sleep, and eight hours for recreation and relaxation.

Q — What is the worth of the common claim that many women are afflicted, during middle age, with a mental abnormality much like madness?

A — Modern medicine does not recognize this saying. It is true that a woman sometimes feels her thoughts wandering and straying from the subject she is dealing with, which leads her to believe her mind crippled and worn out — the fact is that the brain in this period works slowly, and we have only to muster the strength of our will and take complete rest, away from the clamor of social gatherings, until this period passes and we return to our former state.

And there are women whose despair and sense of mental incapacity go so far as to make them wish to give up work for fear of the consequences — and this is a mistake, for occupation in positive work is the greatest of all helps in overcoming the period of weakness, until the "hormones" return to their natural state and the woman regains her self-confidence and her former mental balance. There are, besides, many instances in which woman has produced and set down excellent work in the most varied fields — after the age of forty!

Q — On whom does a woman most depend to pass through this stage of life with the least possible disturbance?

A — On the doctor — I mean her own doctor, who understands the situation and helps her to resolve it. There is no harm in a woman's laying her burden in the doctor's hands and lifting a great part of the load from her shoulders, for he knows better than she where the points of weakness lie, and his words have a power to revive her spirits that not even the closest friend can match!