A Letter to "My Husband"

...upbraids her because she did not take his shoes to the cobbler; hurt by his unjust attitude, she decided to write to him on the subject. She said:

My dear husband,

I write you this letter to deal with a subject that concerns you. I have not stopped working for a moment since early morning: between mopping the house and tidying it and washing the clothes; and on top of that I accompanied our daughter to school and stopped by the market to buy what was needed for lunch. Despite all this, you reproach me because I could not manage to leave your shoes with the cobbler!!... So here I am, in this letter, playing the lawyer's part to defend myself and to enlighten you on this score.

It is said that husbands in America help their wives wash the dishes, and even the guests assist the housewife in this task. I do not ask that of you; but there are matters in which you can help me. Setting the table, for instance — this is a task you can accomplish with art and without lowering your standing, and I am certain that you are able to perform it in the best possible way.

I confess here that you are a good man of generous character, and I remember the day I was ill — how you used to buy, week by week, everything we needed of food and drink; in those days the idea pleased you. Why, I wonder, did you give it up afterward?

I can almost hear you answer my question at once, as is your habit: that is among the duties of the housewife! Faced with this answer, it is worth pausing a moment, you and I, to understand and examine well the duties of the housewife!

1 — Before all else, the housewife must be a skilled cook, and this is no easy matter, as you well know; there are women who make a specialty of cooking to please their husbands.

2 — She must buy her household needs wisely, and know the quantity of vegetables and meat sufficient for two persons, for four, for six, etc. She must also distinguish among the kinds of fabrics and household utensils.

3 — She must be a rearer of her children, if she has children, and a nurse too, if need be.

4 — She must be organized, arranging her time so that she finishes her work before the day's end!

And more important than all this, my dear husband: shortly before your return from work in the evening, I must make myself ready to appear before you in the guise of the cheerful, elegant, clean, perfumed wife who answers her husband's wishes at once — as though she had been, all her day long, at ease and contented!

And here I cannot help reminding you that there is not in all the world a perfect housewife in the true sense of the word. And that is my good fortune! For the perfect housewife is very often a nuisance! She will not, for example, tolerate your flicking your cigarette ash on the floor, nor your putting your clothes or your shoes anywhere but in their proper place, nor will she kiss you until you have washed your face and hands — and so on down the whole list of annoyances, which I am sure you would not accept for yourself...

And I consider it my duty, as a wife, to apply myself to reading, whenever my time allows, especially the women's magazines. There are many who affirm that "it is better for a woman to be a perfect wife than to be a perfect housewife," and I now understand very well the meaning of this saying.

You can see for yourself, my husband, after these preliminaries, that it behooves you to forgive certain small slips or shortcomings that escape me without intention. Tell me, does it detract from your manhood if you take your shoes to the cobbler?!! It is true that you have your worries and your problems, but I too have my worries and my problems. And I hope, after you have read this letter, that you will be more understanding and forbearing than before, and that you will hasten to kiss me, and we shall walk together, hand in hand.

Your devoted wife...